


Variance

by batyalewbel



Series: Familial Bonds [2]
Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, no betas we die like men, s2e10 tag, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-15
Packaged: 2020-10-19 05:15:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20651801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/batyalewbel/pseuds/batyalewbel
Summary: “Michael means that she is the variance. We must let it proceed.”This is what Spock told Dr. Culber and Commander Georgiou when they tried to get past him to Michael.Michael who was dying just outside their door.Could the pair see the way his hands shook as they gripped the phaser?





	Variance

**Author's Note:**

> So some people I guess had Thoughts about the central McGuffin for this ep being lets horribly kill Michael and then walk it back. Mostly I just thought it was wild that Spock has very little reaction to any of is despite this Spock generally having a lot of Feelings(TM) so I did a thing, kinda rewrote a scene, etc.

“Michael means that she is the variance. We must let it proceed.”

This is what Spock told Dr. Culber and Commander Georgiou when they tried to get past him to Michael. 

Michael who was dying just outside their door.

Could the pair see the way his hands shook as they gripped the phaser?

Could they see the way each agonized cry felt like a knife digging deeper in his chest.

He was doing what she wanted. She had _ wanted _to do this.

She said she was the variance.

What if he was wrong?

What if it didn’t work?

Michael had asked him the same thing only minutes ago, caught by the understandable anxiety of what was to come.

He had made a joke and told her that ‘it would be ideal if she survived.’

An understatement, but still a statement of fact.

She wanted this test to play out and that meant letting her die. He could only hope it would be temporary.

So he trembled and stood his ground as the Red Angel appeared.

She always came when she was needed the most, he mused, even as he pressed towards the glass to watch the angel shot a beam of red light into Michael’s chest jolting her upright with a ragged gasp.

It took all his self control to remain where he was as their snare was activated and the red angel was trapped within its field.

He had to stand and watch as the angel struggled against the restraints and eventually collapsed out of the suit, landing on the ground in front of Michael.

They could all hear as his sister stared down at the figure and gasped, _ “Mom?” _

\---

The following moments were a flurry of activity as Michael was beamed directly to Sick Bay and the doors were opened so Stamets and Culber could properly examine their captive.

Spock was about to contact Discovery and request that he be beamed aboard when Georgiou threw him against the wall, her face inches from his.

“If you ever do that again, I’ll kill you,” she hissed.

Spock blinked.

“If I ever have to do that again, I might ask that you do,” he replied. His voice was calm, but his hands still shook and something about the way Georgiou’s eyes flicked over him, made him think she might have only just noticed.

“You Vulcans have a funny way of caring for your family,” she said, letting him go and stepping back.

“I was following her wishes,” he replied evenly. 

Only another Vulcan would be able to spot all the little cracks in his composure. 

The commander simply smirked.

“Just count yourself lucky she survived. I would have definitely killed you if she didn’t.”

Spock just nodded, “I understand.”

“Do you?” she asked and he inclined his head.

“Yes. I do.”

\---

When he was beamed aboard Discovery, he went straight to Sick Bay.

Dr. Pollard looked unsurprised to see him. Although this time he was brave enough to actually cross the threshold and find her and a few attendants milling around Michael’s bio bed, taking scans and discussing readings.

Dr. Pollard looked up the moment he entered with a tired sigh.

“Spock, she’s going to be unconscious for some time and right now we need to make sure she’s stable.”

Spock nodded.

“I’ll wait outside.”

He could hear the woman mutter, “That’s not what I meant,” as the doors slid shut behind him. He stood in the hall, hands clasped behind his back and considered the state of things.

He checked in with Stamets and Culber down on the planet. They had confirmed it was Michael's mother and made sure that she too, was medically stable.

He pulled out a PADD and was running some calculations when the door opened and Dr. Pollard stuck her head out.

“She’s still unconscious and she probably won’t wake up for several hours but…” she trailed off and Spock nodded understanding the invitation.

He followed the doctor inside Sick Bay where a chair had already been pulled up beside Michael’s bed.

He glanced at Doctor Pollard, “Thank you Doctor,” she huffed a little and shook her head, probably at him.

“You’re welcome,” she said and walked away, still shaking her head.

Spock settled into the chair by Michael’s bed and studied her.

They had already healed most of the outer abrasions that the atmosphere of Essof IV gave her and her vitals were steady. It was calming in away to see her so unscathed.

He resumed his work on his PADD, occasionally glancing up to see if there were any changes in her state.

Idly, he considered the potential fallout of finding out that her mother, whom she believed was dead for years, was in fact, alive.

Michael had gone through a lot just in the last few days aboard Discovery. Some of that was his fault, some of it was beyond any of their control.

The loss of her crew-mate had cut her deeply.

She learned that Captain Leland was somewhat responsible for the death of her parents.

She had experienced the physical trauma of dying, only to have her understanding of the world upended as she discovered her mother was in fact, _ not dead. _

He pressed a button on his PADD decisively as he considered it all and at that moment, Michael began to stir on the bed. He hastily set the PADD on the ground and got his feet so he could properly assess her condition as she awoke.

Her rise to consciousness was slow and then abruptly not.

After a moment of her eyes flickering behind half closed lids, they flew open as she bolted upright in her bed with a gasp.

“Michael,” he said and rested a hand on her shoulder, her gaze cut to him although she was still breathing hard like she'd just regained access to oxygen. Her eyes were wide and panicked. Not knowing what to do, Spock squeezed her shoulder and said, “Michael, you’re aboard the Discovery. You’re stable. You survived and have been unconscious for the last few hours.”

She stared at him, hard, before gulping and nodding her head.

Clearly she was still stable, just alarmed by recent events.

She was stable and the relief it brought him was overwhelming...almost discomforting. He wanted to go somewhere quiet and meditate now that he knew she was truly alright.

“I should inform Captain Pike that you’ve regained consciousness,” he said dropping his hand from her shoulder and stepping back. She immediately reached up to grab his wrist, her grip painfully tight.

“Spock,” she said and stared at him with those wide begging eyes.

She wanted to know. 

“We secured The Red Angel. Your mother is currently unconscious but stable down on Essof IV.”

Her grip on him tightened.

“That was real?” she demanded, her voice cracking.

“Yes Michael, that was real,” he responded, unable to free himself from her grasp and reticent to try. He was not sure he was the right person to have this conversation with Michael, but it seemed he had no choice. He took a step back towards the bed and Michael still didn’t let go of his arm.

“No, Spock...she died,” Michael said, shaking her head.

“She--She died Spock…” Her eyes filled with tears, “She _ died.” _

Spock bowed his head, “Apparently she did not.”

She looked away, taking a shaky breath.

“Is my dad alive?”

“I do not know.”

“Can I go down to see her?”

“The Doctor says you need to remain here for now. You were hit with a large dose of Tachyon radiation and--”

“--Did she say anything?”

Spock stared at his sister, feeling her fingers digging into his wrist.

“I do not know.”

She let out a groan of frustration, finally letting go of his arm so she could scrub her face with both hands.

“My mother’s alive.”

“She is alive.”

Michael looked at him then, as if finally noticing something.

“Are you okay?”

He clasped his hands behind his back and inclined his head.

“I am...grateful that you recovered from our experiment on Essof IV.”

Michael smirked a little, “Didn’t want to be responsible for killing another Starfleet Officer?”

Normally he might have just quirked an eyebrow or called her on using the word ‘another’ which was not technically true. Now he just exhaled and said, “It was difficult to comply with your wishes.”

She reached out and again to take his hand, rather than clutching his wrist, she simply held his hand and smiled. It was a small and fragile thing, but a smile nonetheless.

“Thank you Spock, for everything.”

Spock nodded, overwhelmed again.

“I will inform Captain Pike that you’re awake,” he said, pulling his hand from her grip and she simply nodded, still smiling.

“Okay, brother.”

He inclined his head as he backed out of the room, “Okay...sister.”

Her smile widened further still as the doors shut between them.

**Author's Note:**

> Also I will say I don't have a whole fics worth of content about Georgiou and Michael in me, but I do love this dynamic a fair bit too.


End file.
